A night to remember, “Bye, love you!” and the return of the role model. 

Some notable events towards the end of November 2025 have put Scotland in the spotlight and, for a welcome change of late, it is not because of stories about gangland violence and turf wars. A couple of these events, captured on video, have gone truly viral and for all the right reasons too, positive stories that give us all reason to celebrate, Scottish boys and men demonstrating and exemplifying versions of healthy masculinity. 

 

 

We are all too familiar with the distribution of grainy CCTV and doorbell camera footage capturing some sickening criminal, cruel or anti-social behaviour, carried out by young men or boys in TNF joggers and hoodies. However, just as the Christmas trees are starting to appear in folk’s windows in the small town of Denny near Falkirk, a Ring Doorbell captures footage of a group of likely lads marauding up driveway having noticed the decorations inside, two on bikes to effect a quick getaway no doubt.

There’s an inevitability about this scene for the viewer, we’ve seen it all before, surely an altercation with the owner or an act of vandalism is the payoff for clicking on this video… but on this occasion, what happens next is an unexpected delight. We have seen this before but it was 1984 and George Michael and Andrew Ridgeley were providing the performance. To the surprise and joy of the owner of the Ring Doorbell in question, the boys on her driveway burst into a chorus of Last Christmas by Wham! and sign off by saying, “Bye, love you!”. Priceless! An act of pure altruism, simply spreading some Christmas cheer.  

 As if to prove any stone-hearted sceptics wrong and to enhance their credentials as proper nice wee boys, they have done a follow up performance (with improved production values) for the staff and residents at Strathcarron Hospice. This puts to bed any notion that this was a grift, or that the boys were trying to pull a cute trick to get some cash thrown their way, in fact they turned down the offer from the homeowner to come back and get a treat. “Boys will be boys”, is the common refrain and is usually taken to excuse or explain poor behaviour. However, in this case, this was boys being boys, acting in a sweet, un-cynical, age-appropriate way (10 and 11 years old) and getting excited about Christmas.  

 The week the boys in Denny went viral, the Edinburgh Ask Dad Group met and discussed their reactions to the video. This group of men have pre-teen and teenage sons and daughters and have often discussed the challenges that young people face today and the challenges that presents to parents also. Healthy masculinity is a theme that we regularly return to. A couple of the dads in the group had already seen the video on Instagram before I shared the BBC website article that informed me of the viral hit. They were fully heart-warmed by the boy’s actions and were delighted to see a positive story about young men in Scotland after a news cycle that has been dominated recently by stories about young men’s involvement in violence, murder, domestic abuse, sexual assault and organised crime. The majority of serious crimes are being carried out by men but this is not representative of all men. The Ask Dad Group expressed regret we give more coverage and attention to the worst behaviour exhibited by boys and men and concern about the message this sends to society and in particular young boys, about how we expect them to behave. If we continually tell boys that men are violent, misogynistic and gangsters does this become a self-fulfilling prophecy?  

 One member of the dads group hadn’t seen the video prior to the meeting so we got to see his reaction to it “live” as it were. His reaction might surprise some but if I am going to be honest, I had exactly the same thought myself on my first viewing. The apprehension we both felt was that we are setting these boys up to fail because that is how we (society/the UK/Scotland/the media/social media) tend to deal with positive news stories. We build someone up and the moment there is a hint of negativity associated with that person, we tear them down. Think about Captain Tom and how his legacy soured, through no fault of his own. So, let’s not do that to these boys and their story, whatever they do in the future or mistakes they have made in the past. Let’s give them credit for this one. 

 The Ask Dad group relate to the boys in Denny, way more than the extreme versions of toxic masculinity we see in the news. We all see our own sons or nephews in the innocent, playful doorstep singers and applaud those boys for cutting through the negativity and reminding everyone that childhood still exists and it is our role as parents to protect and prolong that period for our children. 

 Young people and perhaps young men in particular need role models now more than ever. One of the Ask Dad Group asked, “Who are they figures in public life today that you can hold up to your children as people of integrity and substance?”. Silence filled the room… until we remembered a national event that spawned celebrations and joy for many, didn’t something incredible just happen with the Scotland Men’s Football Team at Hampden and not just the result? 

 A few days prior to our new superstars from Denny going viral (and who can prove there isn’t a causal link?), Scotland qualify for the World Cup for the first time this century. Step forward role model, Scott McTominay who scores the greatest ever goal by any Scotland player (sorry Archie), sending 55,000 fans inside Hampden and millions more at home delirious, and his first thought as the ball ripples the net, is to look for his mum in the crowd to blow her a kiss.  

 Then there’s the captain Andrew Robertson who having just led his team to return to the World Cup for the first time in a tortuous 28 years, in the midst of exuberant, jubilant, deafening celebration all around him, he takes that moment to give an articulate, thoughtful, emotionally raw interview reflecting on the last few months of living with grief having lost his close friend and colleague Diogo Jota.  

 

Copyright: The Independent

There’s John McGinn whose candour and self-deprecating humour in his post-match interview makes him as relatable as the boy next door. Rather than the robotic, clichéd, media trained sports interviews we are used to from sports “personalities”, McGinn has the air of someone chatting to a neighbour over the garden fence. Despite cementing their reputations as Scottish footballing heroes, this group of Scotland players seem more grounded than most other sports stars out there. Previously we have seen Kieran Tierney, another goal scoring hero from that glorious night in Hampden, troupe out of the Arsenal team bus transporting his kit in a Tesco carrier bag, followed by his “superstar” team mates who have all opted for more ostentatious Louis Vuitton style designer luggage.  

Finally, there’s the Scotland Manager, Steve Clarke. A generation apart from his players, clearly respected and revered by them too, a father figure perhaps? Certainly a mentor. Publicly, he is always guarded and emotionally closed, dour and taciturn in interviews and press conferences. In fact, Clarke is the polar opposite his expressive captain Robertson and charismatic talisman McGinn, though it could be argued, makes him a typical Scottish man of his generation. This made it all the more remarkable to hear Clarke expressing his love and using the very word “love” to describe how he feels about the group of players and staff he has been fiercely loyal to (despite criticism) and grafted alongside for years in pursuit of achieving the nation’s World Cup dreams. 

 Scottish football, which has all too often been associated with examples of negative/unhealthy/toxic masculinity in the past and present: sectarianism, domestic violence, homophobia and racism, can also claim a plethora of role models giving young men a blueprint for how to act with respect, kindness, humility, emotional intelligence, loyalty and humour. We’ve got the role models, now we’ve got the boys and young men taking up their example, confident and comfortable to sign off, “Bye, love you!”